‘Women Are Scary: The Totally Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends’ – A Book Review
‘Get out there all you geeks and weirdos. The world is waiting and you are fabulous.’
Ever found yourself making awkward small talk with other mothers at the park? Well this book really was a breath of fresh air. Friendships with other women have always been important to me and the title of this book surely caught my attention. ‘Women Are Scary: The Totally Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends’ is a catchy provocative title that really encapsulates the essence of what the book is about. This book was recently released by Zondervan this month, and it is funny. Really funny. It’s a light refreshing read, but more than that, it touches on the sometimes complicated topic of female friendship, honestly putting into words what many of us have found in motherhood – that we need ‘momlationships’.
In this book, Dale highlights the importance of mothers doing life together, journeying to each other, ‘finding our people and being other people’s people, and learning how to bless each other and not destroy each other’. This book is both humorous and honest. Sometimes the humour seemed a little over the top. I mean, I know that I can be clumsy, but is anyone really that clumsy? Sometimes humour itself can be a mask. But Dale does share vulnerably with her readers about her years as a new mother navigating for the first time the world of playdates, ‘mommy wars’ and social comparisons. She gives practical advice and tips for forming relationships that go deeper.
Forging authentic friendships with other mothers requires intentionality. We are so busy after children come along, and friendships with other parents can be complicated by the fact that we all have different parenting styles. Have you found this? Many mothers feel alone in our individualized society, but it doesn’t have to be this way.
‘We don’t lack food, clean water, or clothing, but we lack relationships. Whereas my friends in northern Uganda reside in small mud homes and live life together, outside, as a community, gathering at the borehole for water, working their gardens side by side, and looking out for each other’s children, we live in elaborate homes with multiple rooms and water that comes out our own faucets. We drive our cars into garages and close the doors behind us, and we can go days and weeks without interacting with the neighbors unless we’re intentional about making friends.
And while I will continue to champion the orphans and widows whom I love, I’ve realized that it’s no less noble to reach out to the hurting moms and kids right in my own community. If we can learn how to develop real, soul-soothing relationships, there’s no stopping what we can do together for our kids, our families, and the world. But first we have to stop being scary and scared of each other. (Melanie Dale, Women Are Scary)’
‘Women are Scary’ is authored by the very likable Melanie Dale, who is a wife and minivan driving mother of three children, one biological and two adopted from across the globe. She describes herself as a ‘total weirdo who stinks at small talk’. Her laugh is a combination honk-snort, and it’s so bad that people have moved away from her in the movie theater. She adores sci-fi and superheroes and is terrified of Pinterest. If you are a Doctor Who fan, then this book is definitely for you! There are many references to Doctor Who in ‘Women Are Scary’. Melanie writes from a Christian perspective but this book isn’t just for Christians. In fact, any mother could receive something from this book as we all need relationships with other women. Dale blogs at Unexpected.org about motherhood, orphan care, adoption, and sometimes poo. She’s passionate about the power of people partnering together to make a difference in the world and loves her work with Children’s Hope Chest on long-term development projects rooted in relationships. Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It provides light hearted yet concrete advice to mothers of young children who might be feeling a little isolated. Check out this clip about her new book.
*I received this book free from the publisher through the BookLook Bloggers book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255